SSBM: The Quest For A Phone!
by SkullKid
Summary: Ness gets homesick one day and has to find a phone... but it's a more difficult task then he thought... please RR!
1. Home Worries

AN: OK, recently I beat Earthbound and this fic just popped into my mind. Since Ness got homesick in Earthbound... why not in Smash Bros? This is a quest for... well, to go furthur and I'd ruin the story. Oh yeah... and I'm gonna try this in script format, so if it sucks tell me so I can change it so it's better.  
  
SSBM: The Quest For A Phone  
  
Chapter 1: Home Worries  
  
Scene: Ness is sitting, or rather, laying down on the dock in Termina day, he's facing the water and has a worried look on his face.  
  
Link: Ness, dude! what's wrong?  
  
Ness: *sighs* I don't know... I just can't stop thinking about my mom and my family.   
  
Link: So... do you want to go see them or do you want to call'em?  
  
Ness: I guess... would you happen to have a phone on you Link?  
  
Link: *pats himself looking for phone* Hm... nope, sorry little man, but I don't. Maybe someone else does, anyway, I gotta go. I got a date with Samus that I don't want to miss! Good luck on the phone search! *Link waves as he exits the arena*  
  
Ness turns over to face the sky and sighs again  
  
Mario: Ness, what's wrong?  
  
Ness: I'm feeling homesick... you wouldn't happen to have a phone on you... would you?   
  
Mario: No... Peach took it and threw it off of the Montoli building in the fourside stage and I havn't seen it since. Why don't we go use the phone in the hall?  
  
Ness: *perking up* that's a good idea! I can't believe I didn't think of it. I guess I'm that homesick.  
  
~ The Hall ~  
  
We see a small rat running away from where the phone line was as Ness and Mario enter the hall. Ness picks up the reciever.  
  
Ness: *in a depressed tone* The line is dead...  
  
Mario: Well, so one phone is dead, let's go try another one!  
  
Ness and Mario walk over to the dorms to try the phones there, only to find that all the phones are also dead.  
  
Ness: Damn... I don't believe it.  
  
Mario: Ness... I didn't know you swore.  
  
Ness: Yeah, well, I do it all the time, but Nintendo doesn't like me doing that so I have to tone it down for the games. Let's go find Falcon... my senses are telling me that he has a cell phone with him!  
  
Mario: All right! Let's go!  
  
They run off to find Falcon while we see a fat rat crawl out of the building where the phone line goes in.  
  
~Waiting Room Of Mute City Arena~  
  
Falcon: Show Me Ya Moves!  
  
Bowser: Yeah, yeah, Falcon, you don't have to fucking rub it in my face.  
  
Ness and Mario get out of the way of a pissed off Bowser and run up to Falcon.  
  
Ness: Captain Falcon... Can I... Can I borrow your cell phone?  
  
Falcon: Only if you show me ya moves!  
  
Ness: Fine... fine... whatever it'll take to beable to use it!  
  
Ness and Falcon fight while Mario goes to eat some food, satisfied that Ness has found a person with a phone he can use that shouldn't be dead.  
  
Falcon: Wow... that's good. Nice job on the PK Thunder, kid!  
  
Ness: Thanks Falcon... so, can I use your phone now?  
  
Falcon: Sure, go ahead!  
  
Ness: Thanks!  
  
Ness dials the number and hears the phone start to ring, but before anyone can pick up it stops.   
  
Ness: What the hell? What happend to it?  
  
Falcon: Lemme see! *takes the phone* shit, looks like I forgot to turn it off before all the fights today. Sorry Ness.  
  
Ness: *sighs again* It's ok... I guess I'll have to find another phone to use.  
  
Falcon: I think Roy might have a cell phone... at least... I saw him with one last night.  
  
Ness: *while leaving towards Marth and Roy's room* Thanks for your help Falcon! I'll talk to you later!  
  
Falcon: No problem! *mutters* Damn kid... keeping me from getting back on the... *mumbling is no longer understandable*  
  
~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^  
  
AN: Ok... here's another product of my semi-twisted mind (there're more twisted minds out there then mine. What'd you think? Good? Bad? Continue? Or Not? In any case, please do me a favor and REVIEW! 


	2. Cell Phone Trouble

AN: Ok, well, mostly do what the people want. So... I'll tone the swearing down and write this in normal story format. Maybe I'll do the same to the first chapter... Anway, Enjoy!  
  
notes:  
  
  
SSBM: Quest For A Phone  
  
Chapter 2: Cell Phone Trouble  
  
"Well... which room is Roy's?" Ness said to himself as he looked at the directory. "I know where it is, but they're not here right now. But if you follow me I'll let you in." Link replied from behind Ness. "Link! But I thought you had a date with..." Ness started as Link spoke up finishing his sentence, "Samus. Yeah, but she had to cancel... apparently Master Hand and Crazy Hand put her in some last minute competitions. "Oh... ok, thanks Link!" Ness thanked him as he followed him. They reached Marth and Roy's room five minutes later and went inside. Once they were in though, Link was extremely shocked, on the couch sitting next to Roy was Samus. "What the... I thought you had some extra battles today!" Link exclaimed as Samus and Roy turned around. "I did, they're over now and I tried finding you but since I couldn't I figured I'd just wait here in your room for you." Samus told him, "Ok... so, you wanna go on our date now?" Link asked, hopeful of the answer, "Sure!" Samus replied while bounding over the back of the couch and walking over to join Link walking out the door.   
"Lovebirds..." Ness muttered while shaking his head, "Hey Roy!" Ness called getting roy's attention, "Ness, dude!, what's up!" Roy asked... , can I borrow your cell phone?" Ness asked Roy who promptly just stared into space for a second... "Sure... now what did I do with it...?" He asked himself as he patted himself down and stared searching the shelfs. "Ah, I know where it is!" Roy exclaimed as he walked into the kitchen. The cell phone was on the counter charging. "Here you go Ness, just be sure not to call any phone-sex lines and be sure to return it to me!" Roy said as he walked back to the couch to resume watching TV. Ness took the phone and instantly dialed his mom's number. "We're sorry, but you are now out of our coverage area, please return to Altea and try your call again. "Nooooooooooo!" Ness yelled startling Roy who had just started to fall asleep. "What's wrong dude?" Roy asked him while getting up. "It says that I'm out of the coverage area..." Ness said, getting slightly depressed again. "Well, I guess that would explain why I havn't gotten any calls during the tournament." Roy replied. "Gah... do you know anyone else who has a phone I could use?" Ness asked Roy, hopeful of the answer, "Yeah... I think Zelda has one. Why don't you go ask her?" Roy told him, after some thought. "Good idea, thanks Roy!" Ness called as he ran out the door. "Damn kid... maybe now I can get some sleep." Roy mumbled as he went back to laying on the couch. "Now then... where's Zelda?" Ness asked himself as he walked through one of the many halls near the hyrule themed stages. "She should still be in the damned temple stage." Ganondorf stated as he passed Ness in the hall. "Thanks Ganondorf" Ness called to him as he passed not hearing Ganondorf muttering things about how Zelda could beat the King Of Evil.  
  
Ness ran into to Temple stage and was instantly set off balance by a barrage of needles from Shiek. "Ah! Shiek... what was that for?" Ness yelled as he picked himself up from the ground. "Sorry Ness, I thought Ganondorf had returned to get whooped again." Shiek replyed while transforming back into Zelda. "Um... Zelda? Can I use your cell phone?" Ness asked he with some hope in his voice. "I'm terribly sorry Ness... but... you see... my cell phone was smashed in the last fight with Gandondorf. That's why I'm so ticked at him (and why I threw the needles at you when you walked in). "Oh... okay, thanks anyway Zelda!" Ness called while running out Temple stage tears brimming at the edges of his eyes. He ran out of the back of the building wanting to avoid any of the other smashers. He broke from a sprint to a slow jog; by the time he stopped, he was deep into the park that was located in the rather large HAL labs. Once he got there he sat down in a small clearing and just started to sob.  
  
---  
  
AN: Ok... that's a pretty darn short chapter... but I wanna get it up now and I'm sorta out of ideas for what to happen. Any ideas will be appreciated (and you will recieve credit if I decide to use'em). Anyway... REVIEW! 


	3. Why are the ones you don't like the ones...

AN: Alrighty... been a while since I've worked on this fic... and unfortunatly... i've sorta run out of inspiration on it. So this'll be the final chapter... oh well. Maybe i'll return to it and add some more, who knows? Anyway, I give to you the last chapter of Quest for a Phone.  
  
Chapter 3: Why is it the ones you don't like who have your answers?  
  
"Pika?" Pikachu asked as he heard a sobbing coming from a nearby clearing. "Pikachu... pi pikachu!" He called out as Pichu and Jigglypuff ran over. "Pichu?" (AN: Alright... for the sake of my sanity i'm inputting a translator now... -_-;) "Dude! We gotta go see who's crying!" Pikachu stated while hitting Pichu on the head. "Yeah, besides.... I can show off my new cell phone!" Jigglypuff stated while smiling greatly. "You're gonna wear out your cellphone by showing it off so much Jig." Pichu stated while Pikachu was nodding behind him. "So?" Jigglypuff asked, the two rodents just shook their heads and started walking off towads the sounds of sobbing. Ness lifted his large head up and looked around. "I sense them approaching... I must get out of here!" He shouted as he ran off deeper into the forest. "I just heard something, hurry!" Pikachu called out as he ran quicker towards the clearing leaving Pichu and Jigglypuff behind. When Pichu and Jigglypuff made it to the clearing, Pikachu was standing in the middle sniffing the air. "Guys... Ness was here!" Pikachu shouted calling them over, "He went... that way!" he stated while pointing and running off in the direction. "He'll never give up until he's made friends with Ness... will he?" Pichu asked Jigglypuff, "Nope... never going to rest." She stated while walking off with Pichu sitting on her head.  
  
"NESS! WAIT UP!!" Pikachu shouted while picking up speed using his agility skill. "Never... I won't be taken prisoner by the cuteness!!!!" Ness cried out while trying to run faster on his short legs. "Ness, why do you fear us?" Pikachu shouted out noticing that the other two pokemon were just a bit behind him. "I refuse to trust the cuteness and be taken over by it's evil powers!" Ness cried out. "What makes you think us to be evil?" Pikachu called out picking up more speed by adding a quick attack to his already agile state. Pikachu quickly cuaght up to and tackled Ness to the ground. They stared at each other for a moment before Ness finally realized that these creatures weren't evil. They were just forced to be cute and take over the video game world. "Why do you think we're evil!" Pikachu shouted at Ness. "I thought... I thought you were evil because you got more attention in your games then I did in mine! Sure the people who played my game loved it, but you.. you had warped the minds of children all over the damned world!" Ness said quietly, "But... now I see, you didn't mean to do that. You were forced to by Nintendo." "Yup! ^_^" Smiled Pikachu as he got off of Ness. "Say... Pikachu, you wouldn't happen to have a cellphone that works that I could borrow..... would you?" Ness asked, hopeful that he might finally be able to call home. "No... but-" "I have one!" Jigglypuff called out as she interupted Pikachu. "Can I use it?" Ness asked getting more and more excited that after his long day that he could call home. "Sure Ness... just don't break it!" Jigglypuff stated while handing over the phone. "Thank you Jigglypuff!" Ness cried out while giving Jigglypuff a huge hug. "Don't mention it." Jigglypuff stated happy that she could be of some service.  
  
So, Ness called home. He made some new friends, namely, the pokemon. Roy upgraded his service to cover ALL areas, and Ness pointed out the problems with the phone wires to the Hands who promptly got them fixed and got the rats to leave. Zelda and Mario got new cell phones, and Captain Falcon bought extra batteries and kept them all fully charged so his phone didn't die again. Thus Ness' quest for a phone has ended. His home sickness cured, he can continue to fight to the best of his abilities. That is... until the next time he gets homesick.  
  
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AN: Alrighty, that's the last chapter of Quest for a Phone! Hope you enjoyed it, and I'm glad that i'm done with it, because now I have one less fic to worry about. Well, you know the drill by now. Review!  
  
Disclaimer: I dun own SSBM, or anything related to it. Nintendo does, those damned lucky bastards.... ^_^ 


End file.
